Tag Archives: Theory of Thirteen

The Theory of Thirteen

I have a scientific theory.  It’s scientific in the sense that I once took a science class, and it’s a theory in the sense that it’s not based on any sort of fact or experience.  Kind of like Scientology.

The theory is that everyone in life has thirteen people that they could potentially fall in love with (this theory is exclusive to romantic love, we’re not talking about the love that mothers have for their children or the unrequited love I have for the Cincinnati Begnals).  This might sound contradictory coming from someone who’s a self-proclaimed “hopeless romantic”, so let me break it down for you:

Out of the (roughly) six billion people in the world, let’s say about half of them are male, half of them are female, and two of them are Jamie Lee Curtis and Lady Gaga (it’s a hermaphrodite joke. If you don’t know that word, please don’t google it).  So depending on your preference, you have either three billion women or three billion men to choose from.

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